How to Have Healthy Alone Time

By Eric Perry, PhD-c

Audio version | Click here

“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.” ~ Aristotle

When was the last time you had a day to yourself? If you are like most people it was probably a while ago. We live in a world where we are constantly bombarded by external stimuli. All of the noise has caused many of us to lose touch with our inner voice. Whether it is five minutes or an hour, having time to ourselves is a luxury that many of us do not have. It is important to set aside time for the sake of our well being. Making time to sit with your thoughts is a great way to reconnect with yourself. Why not spend some quality time with yourself by having a date with yourself!

Here are some things you can do on your date!

1. Turn off social media
Disconnect from social media! This includes Snapchat, Tumbler, Instagram, dating apps, Facebook, Reddit and yes even WordPress. As I am writing this it amazes me how many ways there are to keep us distracted and disconnected from ourselves and others. How dependent have we become on social media? When was the last time you took a mindful break? It might be difficult at first, but I promise you will survive! You will have more time to yourself, be more relaxed and happier.

2. Start a journal and document your journey of self-discovery
Start a journal and make a list of what interests you. It might be difficult at first, but ask yourself, “What really matters to me?” and “What would I like to explore about myself?” Maybe you would like to learn a language or learn to play a musical instrument. Perhaps you want to re-read your favorite author or find a new author to appreciate. A journal will be a great way to document your interests and personal-growth.

3. Visualize
Take time to reflect on where you are in life and where you see yourself in the future. Visualize where you would like to be and write it down in your journal. Then, take the steps to make it happen!

4. Exercise
The benefits of exercise are numerous. Not only is exercise good for your health, but it is an excellent way to connect with your mind and body. You can walk, run, do yoga or any other form of exercise. It is important to have a healthy balance between mind and body in order to feel whole and healthy. I recommend trying a walking meditation. It can be done anywhere there is room to walk. As you walk, pay attention to your movements. Feel every step. The idea is to stay present and aware of your body. Give it a try!

5. Do absolutely nothing
For most, this is a difficult thing to do. Give yourself permission to do nothing! Find a comfortable place in your home and let yourself just be. I do not mean for you to meditate, reflect or do anything else. Just relax your mind and body. Let yourself just get comfy. If you happen to take a nap, great!

If you found this post to be helpful or interesting please remember to like, comment and share.

Best wishes,
Specializing in a solution focused and results driven approach to psychotherapy, specifically treating narcissistic abuse, depression, anxiety and relationship issues
Verified by Psychology Today
Verified by Network Therapy
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109 responses to How to Have Healthy Alone Time

  1. mindelate says:

    Alone time and silence seem to be avoided and almost feared in our times, because we’re so consumed by our hectic lifestyles. The chaos and the noise all feel ‘normal’. While having quiet moments alone in quickly attributed to loneliness or wasting time.

    A great message in this post! It’s a reminder each one of us needs.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Miriam says:

    Such a great post Eric and so needed in our fast paced world. Sometimes I think we’ve forgotten how to disconnect and enjoy silence but it’s so important. Thanks for the reminders.

    Liked by 1 person

    • MakeItUltra™ says:

      Hi Miriam, I agree. I find that I function much better after I have disconnected for a bit. Have a wonderful day and thank you for your comment ✨

      Liked by 3 people

  3. Marie Abanga says:

    Hi Eric, I discovered me 4 years ago and hmm I trying to find a balance between all my spare time for me and some for my kids v time for others. I mean work and quick back home to me and the boys. But I don’t joke to enjoy my own company, enjoy silent moments with just me, I mean do all those things you highlight and still miss me. I have one hour usually on Thursdays after work to treat myself to a drink … Not always possible but I try. Some say I am becoming very selfish with my time and company, so be it. Thanks for this post

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I’ve been reading about this a lot lately and been seriously considering my desire for it- and whether I think it sounds scary or exhilarating- an entire day alone, no responsibilities… but all alone.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Nicolle says:

    Good advice! I make sure to have some alone time and silence at least a couple of times a week, or I’d become grumpy, being the introvert I am. 😆

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I agree. We all need time to ourselves. A few weeks ago, I drove an hour back to my old neighborhood just to relax and get a massage. I haven’t been able to find a person I like nearby. In fact I turned it into a pamper day for me which is better than spending alone time. I felt so much better after a spa pedicure, manicure, hot wax for my hands and feet and a massage all at one of my favorite places. Everyone said hello when I walked and were truly happy to see me. I enjoyed my special day and came home feeling great.
    Your blog’s are always insightful. I need to reblog this for my site.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. So true. I’ve recently started to have one day of the week as the rest day in which I do not tell myself to have a routine, I allow myself to do whatever I want to do, as much as I want to do and it feels great!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. LynDurante says:

    I really love the number 5 tip: Do Nothing. It’s one thing that I really need to do soonest. I would want to reblog this in my post at my self hosted site with credits to you. Thank you for these helpful insights!

    Liked by 1 person

    • MakeItUltra™ says:

      It’s a wonderful luxury when we get to do nothing! Thank you for your comment and have a great day ✨

      Liked by 2 people

  9. Hey, that’s a great post! Really necessary right now when everybody around us is just too loud! And doing absolutely nothing is the best remedy possible 😉 also I think keeping a journal helps us to connect to ourselves as well. Thanks for the post, good day 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Very important to clear your mind. Other people feel they need to talk to people all the time to work out their issues. But in my opinion everyone elses thoughts on the matter only hinder mine. Im ranting, anyway, alone time is critical. Great article!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Probably the best piece of writing about self- discovery. You covered aspects that are unpretentious but essential, especially visualization, which people often fail to do. To know where we are in life, and where we want to be, to be aware of our past, present and future is of utmost importance. Eye- opening article!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Lady Elle says:

    I am a ambivert working in retail and most of the time i deal with good peope and also bad. On my off days, I have to have a whole day alone and it so worth it. It is a total refresh for the week.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. dreagrey says:

    I have made some of my most important decisions when I have reconnected with “Me Time”. It is oh so important to the soul but us many of us forget this in the hustle and bustle of the real world. Thank you for this timely reminder in a time where the world whizzes past and we all get lost in the shuffle. ♥

    Liked by 1 person

  14. David Swan says:

    I have had too much alone time but agree there is a point when it becomes really beautiful but I sense being dragged back into the ordinary world of work again : ( ; )

    Liked by 1 person

  15. This is beautiful, Eric. Thank you! It’s so important to have alone time that is really quality, tuning inside to what is true, and allowing time to just simply be. Funny, I’m reading a great book on Soul-Centered Leadership called “Get Real” by Stephen McGhee. In it, he talks about the profound power of doing nothing.
    Many blessings, Eric! Debbie

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Good advice! It’s easy to lose track of just how much time we lose to social media every day unless we unplug now and then. Not to say it isn’t nice to keep up with what’s going on in the lives of people we care about who don’t happen to live down the street anymore, but it’s a bit of tar pit if you’re not careful.

    Liked by 1 person

    • MakeItUltra™ says:

      That’s a great description, “tar pit”. You can easily become ensnarled and lose track of time and yourself ✨

      Liked by 2 people

  17. At times it’s hard to pull away from that nagging feeling that if I have spare time, I must be using it in service for someone else. But I really do relish those moments when I am only beholden to my own whims a d fancies.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Thanks for this. I love the time I’ve started scheduling in just for me to do what I want. It might be nothing, it might be exercising, it might be reading/writing/blogging. I might go and get my hair done or I might laze in bed. I might plan out what I want to do over the next days, weeks, months or I might reflect back. Whatever I choose to do, it’s all about me and it’s fabulous 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  19. I HAVE to have my alone time. It’s when I rejuvenate and replenish. In fact, after my divorce, I’ve valued it more than ever and tell potential suitors that I need regular alone time. They’re all fine with it. I think I’m drawn to other people that need that, too.

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Alone time is something I used to think I had a lot of, too much of, but I always invited every single person and problem in my life with me in my head so I ended up more exhausted. And then there was a stage of guilt–I took my time away from things and people who needed my attention. But this way of living, I realised later, actually had the counter-effect and even if I was there in body, I was not present–not firing on all pistons, so to speak. If I am not at peace with myself, I cannot do much for others. Just yesterday evening I took my camera down to the river and I was out for three full hours. My phone was admittedly in my camera bag, but I did not look at it once. Just me, my camera, and the setting sun. Thank you for this post–a refresher of excellent advice and a reminder of how I do things differently these days and how much it helps my wellbeing and affects the wellbeing of those around me when I forget.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. I love my alone time! I find that I enjoy my own company! It gives me time to just be me with no demands and I get energized from the process of just connecting with myself. I love your advice and it’s awesome that you put this out there as it showed that alone time can be productive and ok.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Good article you wrote here. I am taking the advice. After what I have just been through with my recent ex and his hatefulness and terrible posts on Facebook, I need to to just follow your steps … Thank you

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Jescole says:

    Visualizing my goals is what gets me through meditation and everything else.. I have ADHD so it’s hard for me to sit still and focus but this keeps me on tast.

    Liked by 1 person

  24. saralogston says:

    The world we live in makes “alone time” uncomfortable for most. Some people are fidgety at the thought of eating alone regardless. However, our day-to-day relationships are reduced to Facebook likes and quick texts degrading the foundation for basic human connection. The digital addiction is hard to power down when we are feeling alone already.

    Liked by 1 person

  25. fosyed says:

    I used to have alone time either at the beach taking pictures watching sunset or admiring the sea, thinking about life, or by locking myself in my room doing nothing but checking social media or something to keep me busy. But recently i have internet problem for 2 days i really felt like i have no purpose in life, but after a while i realised i’ve got all the time in the world for myself and to do what i want. Internet, social media smart phones are distracting me from myself and my goals. I’ve done all things u’ve listed above except for the SM part, i have to work on it more. And adding to those 5 things, not carrying a smart phone gives u more time for yourself, it’s hard, i lost mine and want to get a new one but i’m delaying this idea because i feel i’m at peace this way.

    Liked by 1 person

  26. Hi Eric, Great post. You were right. People tend to surround by something all the time. Alone time is very much important to lead a healthy lifestyle. I would like to reblog your post on my leadership traits blog as I thought health is one of the most important trait a leader must possess! Thank you for sharing helpful insights..

    Liked by 1 person

  27. रिchie says:

    I so agree with first point. I myself disconnected myself from social media in 2012 to have time for myself… It definitely is best practice in today’s scenario!

    And definitely doing nothing is what I aim… But very very difficult!!!!

    Thank u for the lovely post!

    Liked by 1 person

  28. This is exactly a major reason why I have resisted and been extremely careful to not become involved with social media — I do not want to disassociate from my self and loves, including nature. It is a tightrope difficult balance to try and stay in tune with the world while staying true to my values, hence, I carefully select where I place my time and attention. Still, there are times, and I’ve noticed them more often, that I would like to totally unplug even from the minor amounts of technology where I have become involved. Relocating to a remote location where I must rely simply on living in nature, where the only noise is the chatter of birds, is becoming more and more appealing.

    Liked by 1 person

  29. D I V I N A says:

    Love this one💕 I love silence and people who are able to be in silence with me. R & R is much need from social media 100%✌🏽I am subconsciously doing everything you have written about in this blog, thank you for confirming “gratitude” 🙏🏽 Life is to lived the best way we know how. Cheers Divina ✌🏽😇

    Liked by 1 person

  30. turning20web says:

    Hello!! I am in my twenties and I was addicted to all the social media such as whatsapp fb and insta. Then in the beginning of 2017 I decided to delete all my accounts there and detox myself.. I felt more good.. I got more productive towards my study and work.. And real people mattered me.. I was happy and now I go there once a month..really switching off such gadgets and accounts take courage.. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  31. I wanted to say I love what you’ve created within your blog. This post resonated deeply for me as I struggle to find healthy alone time. Your suggestions are spot on. Thank you for your motivating posts and giving to others a strong positive outlet of informative and optimistic words. Much appreciated!

    Liked by 1 person

  32. simplyjaneen says:

    I have implemented all 5 steps within the past year and although sometimes it’s hard to maintain. I know for a fact I’m a better me when I take the time out to just connect with myself. Thank you 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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