What Lies Beneath Your Emotions

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay “People have motives and thoughts of which they are unaware.” ~Albert Ellis What if you hated someone who you were socially and morally expected to love? For instance, what if you felt hate for your sibling, child or spouse? These feelings, if openly expressed and acknowledged, would be reprehensible to you. According to the theory of reaction formation, these feelings that we fear and deny will cause our unconscious to exaggerate the opposite ofRead more

The Power of Self-Talk

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay “We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves.” ~Dalai Lama XIV Like a faithful shadow on a sunny afternoon, we are accompanied throughout our lives by a constant inner monologue. This voice has been with us since childhood and reflects both conscious thoughts and unconscious beliefs. It may be positive, neutral or negative. Although difficult to study because inner speech is an internal process, there areRead more

It’s Ok To Feel Your Feelings

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay “The way I see it, if you want the rainbow you gotta put up with the rain.” ~Dolly Parton There seems to be a perception that certain feelings are bad and others are good. While some feelings such as happiness may feel better than sadness, it is important to remember that there are no good or bad feelings. We are emotional beings and we possess a wide spectrum of feelings, which have a purposeRead more

The Power of Empathy

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay “You can only understand people if you feel them in yourself.” ~John Steinbeck The ability to see and feel the world from another person’s point of view is one of the most powerful human traits. Empathy allows you to transport yourself into another person and to experience the world through their eyes. Without empathy, we are empty vessels; nothing more than singular and isolated figures unable to connect with the world around us.Read more

You Are Not Damaged

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay It saddens me to hear people refer to themselves as being damaged. They speak about themselves as if they are a commodity that is for sale; a product whose price has been reduced for a perceived flaw. Often this expression is accompanied by the idea that no one would want to be with them. This idea of being damaged often stems from some form of abuse where the learned message was thatRead more

You Teach Others How To Treat You

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay “You teach people how to treat you.” ~Oprah Winfrey Many of us are living our lives repeating the same heartbreaking and unhealthy patterns. We appear to be stuck on replay unable to move forward while continually duplicating the chaos that caused us to leave our last relationship. Perhaps there is a belief that we have a “type” that we attract. We seem to get involved emotionally with the same type of personRead more

Find Meaning In Your Life

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay “There’s nothing like impending death to rouse you from existential boredom.” ~Roger Ebert One of my pet peeves is to hear others complain about how bored they are with life. They wonder out loud, “What is the purpose of it all if we are going to die anyway?” To be bored with our life is a luxury we cannot afford and should not indulge. I believe that this combination of boredom andRead more

Choose Your Attitude Don’t Let It Choose You

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay “If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.” ~Maya Angelou Last summer I was able to take some time off work and fly to Paris. On one particular day while on vacation, I bravely chose to wander the crowded hallways of The Palace of Versailles along with hundreds of others. Click here to see some photos. While shuffling along the cordoned-off walkway there was aRead more

What Are You Psychologically Projecting?

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay “If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn’t part of ourselves doesn’t disturb us.” ~Herman Hesse Do you view the world through the sunny optimism of rose-colored lenses or is the tint of your worldview darker and more gloomy? One’s view of the world has a lot to do with the internal script created by one’s unconscious mind. You are both the author,Read more