What Are You Willing To Allow?

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay Unfortunately, there are individuals who believe they are doomed to duplicate past mistakes and to repeat the same pattern of negative experiences. They mistakenly believe that it is their fault or their destiny to attract negative behaviors from others.  They expect to experience and accept horrible behaviors from people they have allowed into their intimate circle of friends. Throughout their lives, their personal boundaries have been chiseled away to the point thatRead more

Are You in Control of Your Life?

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay “It is our attitude toward events, not events themselves, which we can control.” ~Epictetus Every morning before I head to the office, I go online and check the traffic report. I mentally rehearse my drive, avoiding all congested roadways, and check my backup route just in case. I have a cup of coffee, check my watch, and briefcase in hand, dash through the front door. I try to control my exposure toRead more

How to Identify Passive-Aggressive Behavior

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD “Let’s meet at noon at the gym – oh wait, you probably don’t know where that is.” ~ Anonymous We all have that friend, co-worker or family member who has a special way of saying seemingly harmless words that makes us feel like we have been slapped across the face with a rose only to later find we have been embedded with thorns. These same individuals have the habit of doing or purposely not doingRead more

Fair Fighting Rules for Relationships

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay “An eye for an eye will only make the world blind” ~Mahatma Gandhi Arguments and relationships go hand in hand like peanut butter and jelly. Unfortunately, arguments are not as sweet as jelly and don’t go over as smooth as peanut butter. When we argue with our loved ones, it is important to remember that it’s not necessary to deliver a knock out blow. Think of the argument as a heart toRead more

4 Behaviors to Avoid In Your Relationship

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD “When she asked him whether it was true that love conquered all, as the songs said. ‘It is true’, he replied, ‘but you would do well not to believe it.” ~Gabriel Garcia Marquez We would all like to believe that when we fall in love it will be forever. The truth is, love is a complicated and fluctuating emotion. It is not a superhero power that will conquer all of life’s problems. One has to treatRead more

How to Deal with Emotional Vampires

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD “Anyone can give up, it’s the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that’s true strength.” ~Unknown 1. Don’t be guilted or show pity Emotional vampires are great at using guilt or pity to control and manipulate others. If you show any sign of guilt or pity, you become an easy target. It is important to be decisive, direct and non-reactive when dealing withRead more

5 Signs of Codependency

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD “A lot of the time codependency looks like intense love, but “needing” another person often stems from fear, not love.” ~Jennifer Kass 1. You feel like you will die without the other person The first time I ever experienced what I would call true love, I began to think about my mortality more than ever. I would think about the fact that my time with my partner is not infinite. I would actually get sad thinkingRead more